Let me tell you about my computer debacle.

So, I have this laptop. Until now, this has been the best computer I have ever had. I’ve had it since 2005. Recently, it started to lose power at random moments. So I called the manufacturer and I asked them what to do, and so I did the troubleshooting and it was still happening. So I had to have it sent in. I am low on funds but I was going to bite the bullet and do it, however, I asked if I could pay with check or money order. They told me sure and that I would be billed after the work was done. It made sense to me and that was what I needed. However, they asked for a credit card as a security. I don’t have one, and so I asked work if I could use theirs. They said sure as long as it was only an authorization not a charge.

They charged the card.

This was not cool, since not only did they lie to me, they also made a liar out of me.

So I called them back and I asked them what the deal was and that I was told, on several occasions, that I could pay with money order. They told me that I would never have been told that. I tell them I was. They told me they had no way of knowing that. I told them that was bullshit because I know they record all those calls because I know people who have worked in the industry. Then I was told nothing could be done. I told them to take me higher up.

I went through this a number of times, until one person told me that there was no higher up. I knew that wasn’t true because I was not on the phone with a board director. They told me that I would have to talk to a case manager and that one would call me back in 20 minutes. At which point I pointed out to him that he just admitted there was a higher up and that he lied to me.

No case manager called me back.

So I call HR. HR puts me right through to a case manager. I told her what had gone on and that all I wanted was what I had been told I was going to get. Service paid for with check or money order. She told me she couldn’t do that, and offered me free service instead.

I don’t have much and I wasn’t expecting anything like this, so I was floored and stammered a thank you.

So, I sent my computer in. The replaced the mother board, and the power supply, and for some reason, the hard drive, and did not transfer any of my files.

Thankfully I had backed up.

The computer came back to me and it still was not working.

So I sent it back. This time all they did was replace the power supply. Since this was happening whether or not it was plugged in, replacing it did no good, and it is still having problems. So I got online and told them what was going on. On top of that, I discovered a virus on the “new” hard drive in a directory that was named after the company that makes my computer.

I was told I needed to call tech support. I asked why, and they told me it was because I had escalated service. So I called. I was told my computer was out of warranty which is why it wasn’t being fixed. Every communication I have says “In Warranty” and I offered to forward them to the tech, and they declined. The tech then told me that a case manager would have to call me back and would do so in 48 hours.

No one called. So I called back. This time I was transfered to 3 different people in 30 minutes and then told that I was not called back because case managers do not work the weekends. I was not told this earlier. All I was told was 48 hours. I was then told one would call me Monday.

No one called. So I called HR. HR put me through to the case managers. I was then told that the case manager that was in charge of my case was out sick and would be in tomorrow. Instead of seeing if she would call, I called her. She is sending a box for my computer to be sent back in for a third time.

Let’s see if this works.
All I want is for my computer to work. That’s all.

So that is what has been happening to poetry.

Those people with the headsets,

The kind Uhura wore,

Will be talking in public

And you won’t see the shiny chrome,

Or the bright blue light,

Or the plastic metallic lump

On the side of their heads,

And the person will be looking right at you,

Directly into your eyes,

And will look like they are talking to you,

You alone.

They will say the strangest things,

“What are you doing?”

“What is wrong?”

“I can’t believe it!”

‘Hello? Hello!”

But they won’t be talking to you.

They’ll be talking to someone else

Far away,

With their own Uhura headset.

I’m just waiting

To be out and about,

Sitting at the bar,

Talking to a lady,

Nursing a drink,

Or whatever,

And see somebody

Looking right at me,

Smiling,

Looking directly into my eyes, and say

“What are you wearing?”

“Are you touching yourself?”

As you can probably tell from my last post, my computer is broken and in the shop.  I will try to make up for the lost days as soon as it returns and hopefully get back to one poem a day.

We throw that word around so much,

But am I a geek?

I like what are considered geeky things,

But does that make me something other?

Does it provide an answer to who I am?

What is a geek anyhow?

Does geekdom require obsession?

Is it a need to have things “just so”?

If so, obsessive-compulsives would all be geeks,

But they’re not.

They’re obsessive-compulsives.

Is it specialized knowledge in unpopular areas?

Then all college professors would be geeks,

And comic book geeks and video game geeks

Would not be geeks,

For those things are definitely part of our pop-culture?

Is it otherness,

(A quality I certainly possess),

Like Japanese “otaku”,

Which literally means “outsider”?

Am I a geek?

Am I anything?

Are you?

For they predict a change so remarkable

That it cannot be predicted what will happen next.

Nevermind that he goes on to predict it anyway.

Yet I cannot help but think of the Jetsons,

With Rosie the robot, intelligent talking dogs,

And flying cars that transform into a suitcase.

Even with all their technology,

Bills had to be paid,

Jobs were won and lost,

And food had to be put on the table.

I wonder when technology

Will tackle REAL problems.

It wasn’t that long ago.

I saw these two guys trying to out cool each other.

The same way two geeks will try to out do one another

With who has the latest peripheral, or console, or chipset, or the most RAM.

They are talking about how they each had the coolest phone

And which headset was the most expensive.

Neither realized that the damn things make them look

Like Uhura from Star Trek.

Than two geeks

With something new.

Both want to

Show something new.

Both want to

See something new.

And not just someone who REALLY likes video games,

Or computers, or comic books, or fantasy, or sci-fi, or a myriad of other things,

But the socially painful and awkward geek,

The kind that doesn’t really get how to make relationships work,

Be it friendships, more intimate relations, or business,

Is that sometimes it feels as though the computer is the only friend you have,

And it doesn’t matter if that is not true,

What does matter is that it feels that way,

And the problem with the computer is that never, I mean never, says,

“How are you?”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’ve missed you.”

“I love you.”

And people are really into it

And the band really rocks out

And the show becomes something

To talk about for ages to come,

They send me to get their autographs.

They say I am fearless

and that I am unafraid of celebrity.

They could not be more wrong.

It is only that the right celebrity

Has yet to show their face to me.

If the Woz, Sid Meier, Peter Molyneux, or Bill Gates

Ever show on up

And stroll through that door,

I will not be able to say a word.